Hi Aphrodite!  I’ve been wondering how do I meet someone who shares my kinky views?

I dunno.

 

Seriously, I don’t.

First I have no idea what your kinky views are, I have no idea what you are looking for

[ parameters of a relationship ], and no idea about what you do and do not like.

I can’t tell you where to meet someone who shares your kinky views.

I can share some tips about meeting people in general and allow you to fashion that into a method that is right for you.

#1 Leave your house.  Yes it is 2013, and yes the Internet exists.  The thing is though, what it is that you are looking for is not going to walk up to your front door and say hello.  If that were the case you would not be online asking me questions about how to meet people. Step out of your front door and do things that you like to do.  It doesn’t have to be kink related to begin with, you can do something as simple as go to a different grocery store, or to the library.  Take the opportunity to do something you rarely do to meet people you rarely meet.

#2 Identify what it is that you want.  You say that you want to meet kinky people.  Why? What is it that you want?  Someone to say hey there! I am kinky two so you know that you are not alone in this world?  Well you found this blog so congratulations you are not alone.  Are you looking for someone to help you act out your kinky thoughts? There are websites like CollarMe that will find you plenty of people to meet — but that may be neither safe nor meet your standards.  If you know what you  want, you can bring that into your life, but you have to first know what you want.  Sex. Dating. Marriage. A career in porn. Identify what you want and that will break one of the barriers to finding the kinky people you seek.

#3 Go to a munch.  A munch is a no pressure non kink get together with kinky people.  They are held normally at a bar or a restaurant or some other location where people are free to meet without the pressure of anything other than food and drink.  Most cities have more than one, and they are sometimes connected to an educational workshop where you can learn a kink trick you were ignorant of before attending.  You get to meet people who identify as kinky and from there you can make acquaintances and possibly more. Sites like Fetlife list events.  Just locate your city, and events and go from there.

So that’s what I have.  It’s not a magic wand that will deliver your kinky ideal to your lap, but it is a way to start.

Keep in mind though, that meeting someone kinky is not all that different than meeting someone otherwise.  It’s hit and miss.  You could find the right connection at the deli or on the subway.  You might find the right connection at church.  You might find someone, like them, and then realize in a month you like them even less.

Just because someone is kinky like you doesn’t mean that you are mean to be in each other’s lives.  It simply means you have kink in common.  That is about as reliable in identifying if you will retain them in your lives as eye color.

Get out – use your common sense and don’t take things too seriously.

 

 

Aphrodite Brown