If we don’t tell our children the truth, are we really protecting them?

One of the more controversial topics we will run across in education and parenting is talking about sex.  Birds & Bees do it… even educated fleas do it.  Some of your children are even doing it, yet we somehow think it is okay to not teach our kids about it.

We would not allow our kids to go to school and not learn how to read, write, or count  – but when presented the opportunity for our kids to learn about sex and sexuality we clutch our pearls and suddenly the place we send our children to learn is no longer a place worthy to teach.

In Western – read American – society we want this talk to be left at home, for mom and dad to have this talk.

But mom and dad are you having the talk or are you shoving your head into the sand like an ostrich?  Are you waiting until you 16 year old asks to go out on a date to tell them where babies come from?  If you are… you are already too late.  By 16 the child of today has located the Google and has seen somethings about sex you didn’t even know existed.  And those same kids are asking their equally as ignorant friends about it, getting even more bad information, and dysfunction begins.

Comprehensive sex education should begin at home.  Your child should know the proper names for their body parts.  Your child should know that their body is their own, and sovereign and no one – not even you has the right to touch them without consent. At what age though should this child know?

Likely earlier than you are thinking mom and dad.

The world I grew up in is different than the one that your child is growing up in.  From radio – to television – to the Internet – your kids are more likely to be exposed to things that our parents could shelter us from.  Even if you attempt to limit their exposure, I say good luck with that.  We live in a world where you cannot shelter your child.  What you can do – if you are interested – is to open your  mouth and have a dialogue with your child.  You can give your child a safe place to come with questions, and not ignore the subject because it makes you uncomfortable.

You can also stop fighting at every step of the way your schools teaching some basic sex education to your children.

While the basic sex ed given in schools might not meet your personal moral standards, it can start the conversation.  If your school is teaching that homosexuality exists (which by the way it does)  and your morals tell you that is a sin, don’t ignore it – talk about it.

Knowing that the geigh exists is not going to turn your child geigh.  What it will do is teach them that the world is made up of all kinds of different people, and that in turn gives your the opportunity to show your child the reason behind why you feel as you feel.  It gives you the chance to speak to your child and explain if you think they should wait until marriage – why they should wait until marriage. You can explain why you don’t want them having oral sex or anal sex.  You can explain all of that at the same time your schools explain what pregnancy is and how you can get HPV in your throat that can lead to cancer.

It can be a dual effort, not unlike long division.  And frankly it should be because there really are children out there who don’t have parents in the home they can talk to about these things.  And guess what… they will interact with YOUR children.

And talking to your children about sex and sexuality gives you the opportunity to teach your daughters that there are predators out there who will take advantage of them.  It gives you the opportunity to teach your sons what rape is and to not do it.

You have it within your ability to raise a new generation that might just contain fewer victims if you change the conversation at home… and stop trying to end the conversation in school.

 

Aphrodite Brown