Hi Aphrodite

as I’ve gotten older I’ve found that men my age are having issues keeping up with my sex drive.  While I’ve never thought of dating a younger man, the idea is suddenly appealing in some ways.  My fear is that being beneath a younger man means I am going to have to teach him how to have sex with me.  Ain’t nobody got time for that!  But ain’t nobody got time to be unsatisfied at 45 either….suggestions?

My suggestion is to stop and think about what it is you are looking to accomplish.  If physical satisfaction is all you seek that can be found at just about any age, with any partner and their number of years on the planet is not all that relevant.

If you are looking for a relationship…something a little more substantial than your orgasm of the moment, now we enter territory where age might mean something.

The bottom line is with every new partner there  is teaching happening.  The human body is not uniform in how it receives pleasure.  What worked for your first lover will not work for your last lover.  What works with your lover of 25 years is going to vary from day to day — sometimes hour to hour.

While there might be certain things that you like as a standard, every new sexual experience, even with the same person is going to bring variation to what gets you off.  That is the teaching I speak of, the teaching that happens every time you take off your clothes to do it.

Since teaching AND learning is a constant part of the sex we should be having, I see nothing wrong with that method being done with a person chronologically younger than yourself.  If they can legally vote (age 18 or older) – if they consent – make it clap.

If you happen to be looking for something MORE than your physical needs met, you might have to look past the 2015 freshman class of Howard.

While May/December romances happen, and some are even successful, what holds a couple together is more than how many times you buss a nut.

You might find that the 20 year old has the energy and stamina to ‘keep up with you’, and you might also find a person who can’t tell you what a rotary phone is and what life was like before The Google is not good for much else besides knocking boots.

With 42 waving emphatically at me from around the corner I get just how YOUNG 45 is in my vizion of things.   While I get that some men (and women) in my age group are having issues, I also get that a little clean living, exercise and a multi vitamin a day puts pep back into the step of an “old man” who is otherwise a good over all fit for my needs.

Let’s also add that while some younger men have a faster refractory period, quality and quantity are different.

There are benefits and draw backs from both…the question is what will be best for YOU.  That is something only you can answer.  I say don’t worry about having to teach….you are gonna do that anyhow.  Worry about having great sex – with a great partner – in a safer sex fashion and the Os will flow

 

Aphrodite Brown