Allegedly I should applaud Elania Watley for her group text message to the “side chicks” of fiancé Victor Cruz. Yeah…..not gonna be able to do that sorry.

News hit the blogs about two weeks ago that Watley sent out a group text message to the alleged side chicks of her fiancé.  The Internet applauded her courage.  It was about time someone put these hos in check!

I don’t find her act courageous at all.  I find her to be desperate, scared and foolish.  This isn’t a blog about why it’s okay to cheat on your significant other this is a blog about why the side chick is always going to win.

You woman dating, married to, engaged to, married to professional athlete are not special, but he is very special.  This is a man that’s been treated like he is special and entitled his entire life. The only rules that apply to him are the rules of his sport which pays him millions.  Any rules you think you are going to impose on him aren’t his reality they are your own.

That man you love has received privilege likely since elementary school.  As he aged the entitlement grew. It stopped being about extra dessert in third grade and became about women and cash around high school.  By the time that man hit the pro level he understood that if he ran fast and trained hard men would give him money and women would give him pussy.

When you came around and he “chose” you, he chose you with the understanding that those two things he’s gotten used to – money and pussy – would continue to flow. If you thought differently that’s your issue not his.

The women who fuck your man while they might know you, or about you, they don’t care. They don’t care about your feelings. They don’t respect your position. They do what they wish to do with your guy.  Yes some of them think they will replace you but most don’t and also don’t wish to replace you.

They get the benefits of time with your guy without the responsibility of being the official significant other of your guy. When they are ready to move along to the next they can without consequence. They will, eventually.

You on the other hand have to wipe noses and locate pre schools. You have to make sure the maids arent  stealing and the right people are sitting in the right spots at dinner parties.  When he gets his knee scoped out you have to sit by the hospital bed. You have to deal with his mother and you have to tell cousin Pookie that you’re no longer going to pay his rent.

The side chick gets to go to the gym, get her pedicures and the dick.

She isn’t going to trade you and when she gets that group message from you she gets 10 minutes of fame at BallerAlert.

There is no lose in it for her which is why she is always going to win.

There is loss for you however if you send that message.

Women like myself will chuckle at your desperation.  If you haven’t established your own career and own abilities you risk losing your way of life.  You lose your social status and if you are just the fiancé and not the wife you risk walking away with nothing for all you put up with over the years.

If you’re the main chick should you tolerate cheating? Not my call. You will or you won’t.

As the former side chick, yes I’ve been the side chick, what you do doesn’t affect me. He is still gonna call me when he wants. We are still gonna fuck your man if we want.  He is still gonna give me presents and I get to send him home to you when I don’t want to be bothered. No matter how many times you tell me to stay away from your man, I won’t.

I have no investment in you, I made no commitments to you. The worst that is going to happen is he and I are going to have a talk where I tell him to check you.  When you show up at my home I am not opening the door.  When you call me out I’m not going to fight you.  After you’ve expended all that energy I am still gonna see your dude next Tuesday at 10am and suck his dick.

So what is the main chick to do?

Live with it or not.

If you are in a relationship with a man and you’ve told him you expect monogamy, hold him to those expectations. If he doesn’t meet those expectations deal with him. He is the one who broke his promise to you. Even an athlete can live up the standard of monogamy, just don’t be surprised if he doesn’t. And don’t blame the side chick.

 

Aphrodite Brown