Like many of the entries here, a conversation promoted this moment. What does one have to do to earn my ______.

I’m one of those unique creatures in nature who doesn’t do what she doesn’t want to do.

If I am doing something it is because it fits a need of mine, and while that is totally selfish, the rest of the world still reaps the benefits.

One of the things you run across in this alternative lifestyle of mine are people who say they love to serve.

I get it. I just don’t. Service is not beneath me, it is nothing foreign to me, when I choose to do it I am exceptional at it, but service for the sake of it doesn’t get my nipples hard.

I’ve historically been asked how it is that I can be on the bottom and not like service. I’ve been asked how can I walk through all of the careers I’ve chosen and not like service. The answer is service in the moment is about me.

Even when in the middle of the compulsion which is present for those I’ve served.., it’s still all about me.

No submissive guide teaches that, which might be a part of why I am often asked if I actually am submissive.

When I choose to lay down my authority it is about me, it is about my need in that time. There is something unique about you which inspires a desire within that wants you to stick around. I don’t make you happy because you mean more to me, I make you happy because your happiness means you stick around. It’s a complicated thing to explain but I shall try.

When I want to give you me, it is because there is something about you which let’s me know I can trust you with the majesty of me. It is about my need to let down my defenses and experience the freedom of being complete.

It is not about you.

Yet, you still have to earn that place.

Often I am found to say the only person who’s never had to earn me was Clyde. That’s not totally accurate though. He also earned me, he just did it by kicking my ribs and sitting on my bladder for 36 weeks.

You have to prove to me you are worth the effort.

You have to show up. You have to be attentive. You have to display desire. You have to be consistent in deed. You have to be transparent. And you have to do that for a period of time, and that is more than a week, its more than 5 months.

During that time you get some of me, depending on the compulsion you might get MOST of me. You have to earn all of me though.

If you’ve been here for a while you’ve come across a lot of nicknames for people who’ve had my interest for a moment. You’ve read about lots of my conquests. You know I don’t require monogamy. But you’ve only read about one person who had all of me.

I am priceless. I am magnificent. I am irreplaceable. Why would I not preserve that? Why would I cast about all that I am in all my glory for everyone….if they have not earned it?

We can have an instant chemistry and connection, but the only way you get all of me is by showing over time that you are worth it and able to handle it.

That’s not done over the phone. That’s putting skin in the game.

I don’t need you to make me happy. I am responsible for my own happiness. I don’t need you to make me cum. I am skilled in my own pleasure and when I need a physical partner I can get that as well. I don’t need you to support me, I own bras even if I dislike wearing them. I am self contained, and asking me to change that for you requires you to earn it.

Before I commit to you I’m going to ask questions, and I am going to wait to see that the answer from your mouth is also the answer from your actions.

As casual as I can appear to the populace, I am nothing of the sort.

When I do commit it is always with the intention that such commitment does not end. The public display of that may not be traditional, but it is with the intention of life for me.

History has shown me that even with my intentions it doesn’t always work, but that doesn’t change my core.

Since my core is static, I can have the patience to allow you to earn it.

I see nothing wrong with that.

Aphrodite Brown