Those of us a little more seasoned in this kink thing warn the kids on the streets about NRE – New Relationship Energy. It’s a state of mind, manifesting physically and emotionally when you first meet someone you will eventually partner with, or marry if that is your thing. Defined as short as 90 days or 2 years depending on who you ask, this state of being is before the rubber hits the road.

It’s when the new person can do no wrong and it’s all I love you and flowers before the mundane invades your life and reminds you that perfect for you person is not at all perfect.

I don’t really have NRE, unless we are discussing my libido.

I do have a common human trait of looking at Daddy with rose colored glasses.

I know that he is imperfect. And yes there is always that moment the first time you SEE it, but I try not to put the pedestal up so high that they are injured in the eventual fall.

If I accidentally do? Then I throw myself in their trajectory to break the fall.

What this time with him has shown me is that I don’t have to worry about breaking his fall.

I was super nervous, and still am for the next 4 days. I worried if he’d smile at me. I wondered what the new vagina would feel like. I worried that I would do that goofy thing like stare at him saying nothing [I did], and I worried that after all this time I would or he would think, nah.

I want him more.

It’s the thing with me. Once I say yes it only increases IF, you are who you say that you are.

If you aren’t then there is no breaking that fall, it is a long one, and one that can take years to land but you will eventually. Ask Grant.

Every moment of our time so far reminds me that if there’s such a thing as ‘right’, for me he is it.

I have no idea how I am going to let him go. There is a lot I have no idea about right now. Unfortunately